Ever have one of those days where you switched bags and your key is attached to the other bag and you used the spare key this morning and forgot to put it back and there’s a tsunami outside and your window is already partly broken but you’re pretty sure it’s unlocked but then it isn’t and you break it by mistake and then just go full fucking hog on it while the rain beats down mercilessly on your stupid head because you can hopefully reach the door handle and you do but end up ripping a bit of one of your favorite jackets and then you have to sweep up all of the goddamned glass and keep yelling at your dog because he keeps coming into the kitchen because he’s dumb and lovable and wants to help but there’s glass everywhere and then you have to tape up the window with a garbage bag and cardboard and the shittiest tape available? Yeah. Me, too. #fml

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