Writing the Report…

I love Blink 182.

Most of the time, when I say this, people scoff at me. Matt is certainly one of those people. I can understand it but I just don’t care.

A memorable reaction was when I was talking to some guy in a bar a long time ago about another band that I love, Flogging Molly, and then I mentioned that I loved Blink 182 and he said, “I fucking hate Blink 182” and walked away. I thought it was funny, especially because he was a giant dork.

Also, years ago, while driving in the city with my brother and best friend, Rachel (on our way to Saturday Night Live, I believe), I somehow got him to play one of their albums. And he says,
“Actually some of their songs are pretty good.”
“Actually? All of them.”

Some concert memories:

One time, I drove to Long Island to see them at Nassau Coliseum with a (now ex, obviously) boyfriend who got so drunk during the show that he actually PASSED OUT on the people in front of us. Full on fell on them. The poor skinny girl somehow caught him. So embarrassing. And then on the drive home, when I was completely lost and stopped at a gas station, he took the map out of my hand, crumpled it up, and haphazardly tossed it into the back seat. And then had no recollection of what he’d done the next day when I told him the story. I really miss you, Bryan. Call me.

Then there was the concert at Roseland. What a grand evening that was. We all paid $73 for ten dollar tickets. Then when walking (limping in Rachel’s case) down to the bathroom, some little emo-ish d-bag in the making decided to grab Rachel’s ass when we were walking by. He had no idea what circle of hell he’d just signed up for when Rachel turned around and slapped him in the face and I pegged him against the wall, yelling at him about respecting females. Then there was the guy at the bar complaining about how much he hated the band and how someone had given him a free ticket and how he should have just stayed home and blah blah blah. So I interrupted his diatribe with a heartfelt, “Then why don’t you fucking leave!?” And he looked at me like who in the hell are you? Me? I’m the one who paid seven times the ticket price for mine and am THRILLED to be there, yelling along with every song. Also? I’m the belligerent one who’s going to make you wish you hadn’t crawled out of your hole to make it to the concert that you didn’t want to come to. He left. Shocking. And then we all danced around like fools to all of the songs, loving every minute of it. That concert was so much fun.

And then it started getting lame. Another time, I went to see them at a race track in Massachusetts and everyone there was 13 and they were with their parents. I would so not want to be the parents, horrified at the overly sexual comments that the band members come up with. That was the end of the concerts. And now that they don’t exist, there aren’t any more anyway.

But I really love the band. Still. I know that they make crappy music. I know that when I go to the bar and one of their songs comes on, every frat boy with a popped collar will start hopping up and down, high fiving their douchy friends.

I recognize their idiocy. As Tom Delong put it on The Mark Tom and Travis Show, “We’re professionals. You might not have known that but we are professionals. And what we do is professionally suck and professionally act like a bunch of assholes on stage. That’s what we do.”

How can you not love someone who says that?????

I just simply love listening to them.
I love shouting their music at the top of my lungs in my car.
I love playing albums on repeat. Once is not enough. Hell, twice isn’t enough.
I love that half of their lyrics make absolutely no sense. I shout those ones even louder!

There are some lyrics that do make sense though. Some that hit me when I hear them. Some that represent a time in my life and fill that needed spot. Here are a few:

“Here I am. Standing on my own. Not a motion from the telephone. I know not a reason why solitude’s a reason to die.”
“I’m ripe with things to say. The words rot and fall away. What stupid poem could fix this home? I’d read it every day.”
“I never did do anything that she asked. I never let what happened stay in the past. I never did quite understand what she meant. In spite of everything.”
“So read my book, with a boring ending. A short story of a lonely guy.”

Another favorite: “I’ll take what you’re willing to give and teach myself to live with a walk-on part of a background shot from a movie I’m not in.”

And I simply love everything about Adam’s Song.

And honestly? This quote is just pure poetry:

“I’m writing the report on losing and failing. When I move, I’m flailing now.”

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